Tree Leaping Gone Wrong
by PrussianMatrix456
Summary: Prussia thought it would be so easy to spy on England and America during the course of World War Two. But when he finds himself jumping from tree to tree right above their heads, he finds himself in a bit more trouble than predicted.


**Alright, so I was cosplaying Prussia out in the snow a few months ago, and my friend took this photo of me while I was talking, and another friend suggested it may make a fun story/explanation as to what was going on. I, of course, was inspired to write a little story. It is kind of dorky and serves no purpose XD but it was fun to write.  
**

**The pictures are on DeviantART, if anyone is interested, just ask and I can link it to you.**

**Enjoy!**

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_Crunch, crunch, crunch…_

There was a pause as the footsteps came to a halt, military boots sinking down in the deep snow. He was making too much sound tromping along in this snow through the French woods. There was no way he would be able to effectively sneak up on his target in such conditions. He needed a new tactic.

Gilbert Beilschmidt, better known as the former Kingdom of Prussia, swiveled on his heel in the snow, almost toppling over, and inclined his head upwards to get a good look at the pine trees above him. An idea sparked to life in his head and an impish grin spread across his pale features.

"Of course!" he whispered to himself. "I could just swing from tree to tree. Primates make the task look so simple, why couldn't I do it as well?"

Praising himself on his brilliance, Gilbert let out a sly laugh and jogged/waddled through the snow banks over to the closest tree. He reached up and grabbed onto the closest branch, heaving himself up while his slippery feet kicked repeatedly against the trunk to find some purchase. Keeping his hands tight around the branch, Gilbert finally kicked both legs up as hard as he could and wrapped them both around the lower end of the branch that he was holding onto.

The plan was going perfect so far, Gilbert would have to explain to Ludwig just how awesome he was at spying when he returned back to their military base.

Gilbert moved his arm and hooked his elbow around the branch, pulling his body up and over so that he was able to lie on top of the branch. He eased himself up to a sitting position and turned his head from side to side, taking in his surroundings. The albino was able to scurry up a few more branches before he heard the voices that he was waiting for.

"Furthermore, I do believe that it is high and time for all of this bloody snow to melt away."

"Come on, Brit, dude. Snow is fun! You can have snowball fights and make a snow fort and a snow man… The possibilities are endless!"

The two voices were growing closer and Gilbert inched forwards a little bit on his branch, finally seeing the messy blond hair of Great Britain. America's sandy blond head was following close behind.

"In any case, talking about the snow is not something we need to discuss at the present time," Arthur stated, shoving his gloved hands into his coat pocket. "We have more important matters at hand to worry about."

Alfred shrugged his shoulders and glanced behind them then kicked up a good storm of snow with his foot that, luckily for him, missed the British man ahead of him.

"I know, but keep in mind, _you_ brought up the snow first."

They had passed right under Gilbert's tree and never took any notice to the perched albino above their heads. Gilbert smirked; he was clearly the best spy around. But now they were moving on and he could not lose them yet. With amazing ease and balance that he had acquired over his many years of, well, being alive, Gilbert planted both feet on the branch and rose up a bit shakily. He reached up to grab the branch above him and steadied his body. The pair was quickly getting away; Gilbert had to move quicker.

Analyzing the tree in front of him, Gilbert bent his knees a little bit and launched himself right into the next tree with a silent laugh and a huge grin on his face.

"Did you hear that?" Arthur asked as he came to a halt, turning to face Alfred with a perplexed expression, "it sounded like something in the trees."

Alfred inclined his head to look up then smirked a bit. "There are these crazy little things called squirrels. They live in trees, y'know. Sometimes they jump around, visit their neighbors."

The British nation scowled and smacked his ally on the arm, declaring sternly, "no one likes a smart ass!" He turned away, glancing around in the trees. "It sounded a lot bigger than a squirrel..."

Meanwhile, Gilbert was hanging from a thick tree branch, hidden by the trunk of the tree and pine needles. But he knew Arthur had a sharp eye and if he was not careful, the blond would pick him out immediately. He resisted the urge to kick his legs back and forth while he hung there and had to wait until Arthur had looked the other way before he was able to get his feet onto a steady branch below.

"Still think you're crazy," Alfred muttered, shrugging his shoulders and starting to walk again. Arthur uttered a few insults to his back as he hurried along behind.

"Time to move again..." Gilbert whispered as he kneeled and leaped forward to the next tree. This time, his foot hit the branch and slipped right off its slick surface, causing the Prussian to fly forward right into the tree with a slight yelp. The two allies below both halted and whirled around on high alert, hands on the weapons at their sides.

Fortunately for the albino, there were more branches right under him and he flopped down on them on his front, his head falling forwards. His hands wrapped around the branches under his chest and he allowed himself a few deep breaths before pushing himself up a bit.

"Okay… Yeah, I heard that one."

"I bloody told you!"

A rough smack was bestowed upon the back of the American's head and Alfred squeaked in pain.

Arthur began stomping through the snow back the way they had come, gloved hands balled into fists.

"I swear, I am going to come up there and find you myself, whoever you are!"

"Um, how do you know it's a person?" Alfred trotted after the elder. "Seriously, bro, squirrels can make a lot of noise."

"Squirrels don't yelp like that!" Arthur snapped, pausing.

Alfred snorted, "Not American squirrels. Maybe they do here in Europe, though." He nodded, fully aware that the statement sounded completely ridiculous but he did not want to have to deal with Arthur hoisting himself up into one of the trees and chasing around some spy, only to slip and fall out of the tree and break a limb. Alfred had better ideas as to how to handle a spy.

"You git! Stop spouting out rubbish and help me out here," Arthur stopped at the base of one of the trees and placed his hands on the wood, "I will climb up the tree and find out."

Alfred un-reluctantly came up behind him and chewed his lip for a moment in thought then said, "How do you know it's _that_ tree? Maybe the squirrel-hybrid spy moved onto a different tree."

"Oh, please," Arthur rolled his eyes, "if that thing moved again, we would have heard it. It isn't exactly the stealthiest creature out there."

Gilbert gaped a bit, finding Arthur's statement rude and completely false. He knew he was a stealthy spy; he just was not in the best of environments for jumping around from tree to tree. The branches were extra slippery today. But now Arthur was at the base of his tree and he better do something fast.

Standing up slowly again, Gilbert stepped onto a branch beside his feet and noticed that the next tree was a lot closer than the others had been. He smiled and reached his arm out, his gloved fingers wrapping around the branch and looked down at his feet. This should be easy.

He lifted his right leg, moving it sideways and planting his foot safely on the branch. _So far so good_. Just as quietly and carefully, he lifted his left leg and started to move it over. However, his right foot pushed to the side a little too much in his movement and the next thing the Prussian knew, he was falling, managing to hit every single branch on the way down.

Just as soon as he realized that he was falling, he hit the ground. The landing was not the most pleasant landing, but it was also not the worst he had ever had before. Of course, he managed to land face first in the snow, limbs splayed out and bent. The snow was even colder now, pushing itself up against his face and through his lips as he gasped out air.

"Bloody hell! You!"

"Well… I guess it isn't a squirrel."

Gilbert closed his eyes, mentally cussing himself out at his slip up. Now he was out in the open for these two to grab and drag back to their own base. He could not fail this mission, not now. That would be so unawesome.

Arthur and Alfred stalked closer to his buried body and halted right at his out stretched hand.

"If it isn't Prussia. Swinging from branch to branch like the ape he truly is."

Gilbert flinched a bit at the strong British accent that had come a little too close. Alfred stretched his leg out and lightly toed the German's side, saying, "I believe he is alright. Kinda surprised he hasn't jumped up yet and tried to attack."

Now Gilbert lifted his head, spitting watery snow out, and blinking against the sunlight.

"Oh… Hey, there, you two," Gilbert greeted, putting on a smirk, "how's it going?"

"Get up," Arthur demanded as he reached down and grabbed the back of Gilbert's jacket, yanking him right up to his feet. Gilbert looked down at him, almost a whole head above the Brit.

"So… I should probably get going," Gilbert pointed backwards with his thumb, uttering a small laugh.

"Oh, I don't think so, you bloody ape."

Alfred tilted his head a bit, peering at Gilbert curiously through his glasses. "So, what're you doing climbing around in trees anyway, bro?" he asked.

"Oh!" Gilbert's face seemed to light up a bit, as if he was surprised by hat question. "Well, I'm glad you asked!" he held a hand out in front of him, shifting his weight, "I thought I could get an understanding of what squirrels felt in their everyday lives."

"Ah, see Artie?" Alfred turned so he could give the British nation a knowing look. "I'm not the only one who thinks about what squirrels feel."

Arthur stared blankly at him for a moment, started to speak then shook his head and looked back over at Gilbert.

"You were spying on us, Beilschmidt."

"_Ja_, and if I was…?"

Arthur pulled his handgun out and pointed it at Gilbert, who eyed it for a moment then shrugged, unfazed by the threat.

"We are going to take you back to our camp, as our prisoner," Arthur declared, "Germany is going to be pretty angry when he finds out about this."

"How exactly is Germany going to find out we took his brother prisoner then?" Alfred asked curiously. "Are we going to send him a letter? Because we haven't exactly been able to locate him yet."

Arthur shrugged his shoulders, keeping the gun pointed at Gilbert's chest while he turned a bit to regard the American. "Well, I will figure it out," he said. "But the point is, he will find out that we have his brother prisoner."

"Sooo… Are you perhaps going to stand near the next German military camp we come across and scream out for Germany, then inform him that we have former Prussia, and run off?"

"No, of course not! That would be ridiculous, you bloody idiot."

Looking between the two as they argued back and forth, Gilbert leaned back a little, taking a slow step backwards. No one noticed him and the gun in Arthur's hand did not move.

"Then maybe we should just keep quiet about having him as a prisoner, and let Germany figure it out on his own, sound good Arthur?"

Another step backwards. Gilbert wanted to smirk confidently, but he knew he was not in the clear yet. Not at all.

"Oh, just grab him and drag him back with us, alright, Alfred?"

"Why do I have to drag him back?"

Gilbert grabbed onto the tree be had backed up into, moving around it slowly then turning around, his back to the other two nations completely. He started walking, hands stuffed into his pants pockets and letting himself smirk now.

"Because you are the strongest of the three of us, so grab him and let's go."

Alfred sighed a little before shrugging his shoulders. "Fine, I'll grab-" as the American spun around to grab onto the Prussian, he froze, eyes widening.

"Oh god… Where the bloody hell did he go?!" Arthur exclaimed in rage, about to slam his gun down into the snow then stopping himself.

Alfred leaned around a bit, looking all around the area surrounding them. "I can't spot him… Man, he's fast. I'm sure if we move around, we might be able to find him."

"Oh, hell, we don't have time for that!" Arthur threw his arms up then let them fall back down at his sides.

"Then I guess we should just go," Alfred suggested slowly, looking down at Arthur.

Reluctantly, Arthur agreed, but not without turning out to the trees and yelling out, "Damn you, Prussia!"

"Yeah, cause that won't attract attention…" Alfred muttered as they began trekking through the snow once more.

"Alfred."

"Yeeeees?"

"Shut. Up."


End file.
